Jul 1, 2008

I'm Old Greg!

Howard: What’s happening?

Old Gregg: I’m Old Gregg.

Howard: What?

Old Gregg: I’m Old Gregg!

Howard: Where am I?

Old Gregg: Gregg’s place. You’ve been asleep. Do you want a little drinky? I’ll get you a drink. You like Bailey’s? Mmmm… creamy. Soft, creamy beige.

Howard: Mmmm… delicious.

Old Gregg: Do you like Old Gregg’s place? I’ve got all things that are good.

Howard: You’ve done some nice things with it.

Old Gregg: I’ve got this. This is good.

Howard: That’s nice.

Old Gregg: You can have it.

Howard: I’m fine thanks.

Old Gregg: I’ll keep it here for you.

Howard: Well, is this the way… out? Ummm, I better be scootin’. Got meetings and a friend of mine is waiting, so perhaps I should be…

Old Gregg: Why are you going? We got everything we need here. We got Bailey’s… creamy. And everything we need. I’ll get you another Bailey’s.

Howard: I’m fine, thanks.

Old Gregg: I do watercolors.

Howard: Do you?

Old Gregg: Let me show you something. I call that one Old Gregg. And then that one I call Old Gregg. And this one, you know what I call that one?

Howard: Old Gregg?

Old Gregg: Yes sir, thank you sir. I got some more. I got these 2. That one’s Bailey’s. That one’s Bailey’s a bit bigger. And that one’s as close as you can get to Bailey’s without your eyes getting wet.

Howard: Mmm, that is quite a portfolio you’ve got going on there. But I really should be heading up, so it’s been good.

Old Gregg: We could do some watercolors together. You and I.

Howard: Well, that sounds like great fun. Let’s do it in the week then Gregg.

Old Gregg: What do you mean?

Howard: What, you free Thursday at all?

Old Gregg: Why can’t we do it now?

Howard: Well, you know I’m a busy man Gregg. You know, I got things to do. Howard Moon, man about town. (laughs awkwardly)

Old Gregg: Do you love me?

Howard: Oh dear.

Old Gregg: Do you love me?

Howard: Umm, gonna have to pretend I didn’t hear that Gregg.

Old Gregg: You think you could ever love me?

Howard:Uh, it doesn’t really work like that, Gregg.

Old Gregg: How does it work? Tell me how it works.

Howard: Well, you get to know someone, you hang out, you see where that goes. This, that, the other, eventually… you know. I don’t know you!

Old Gregg: You know me. Hmm? What about the boat times?

Howard: That wasn’t really a time, was it Gregg? That was more of just a… an exposure.

Old Gregg: That was our first date. Hmm? You pulled me up with your strong arms!

Howard: Oh dear, look Greg I don’t know you!

Old Gregg: Oh, you know me. You’ve seen my downstairs mix-up.

Howard: Yeah, I didn’t ask to see that, did I?

Old Gregg: What it did mean for you to see that. Did it mean you loved me?

Howard: No, I didn’t.

Old Gregg: Could you learn to love me?

Howard: No, I couldn’t. I don’t love you!

Old Gregg: You do love me.

Howard: No, I don’t!

Old Gregg: You do love me.

Howard: No, I don’t.

Old Gregg: You love me and you’ve seen me and you know me. I’m Old Gregg!

Howard: Yeah, I know you are. You’ve told me 80 or 90 times now.

Old Gregg: You must love me exactly as I love you.

Howard: Well, I don’t love you and to be honest you’re starting to get on my nerves a bit now. If anything I find you slightly pathetic, so deal with that!

Old Gregg: Maybe I will deal with it. Hmm? Maybe I’ll deal with it the way I dealt with Curly Jefferson!

Howard: You know what Gregg? Maybe I was being a bit hasty there, uh, when I said I didn’t love you. Perhaps now in this light with you in the tu-tu and the water playing off your… seaweed. Maybe I could love you. Maybe I was lying because when you do love someone sometimes you say you don’t because you’re playing hard to get, playing a game.

Old Gregg: Games?

Howard: Yeah, I was just playing a game with you.

Old Gregg: Love games?

Howard: That’s right, love games, Gregg.

(funky music starts)

Old Gregg: Love games?

GO TO http://youtube.com/watch?v=h0S6vL0-u58 IF YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS IS

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